Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Unmoored

Okay, this is an odd sensation. I noticed this yesterday, while I was all stoned and floating above the earth and all that great stuff, but it didn't strike me as so interesting then. (Wonder why?)

You know how when you are cold and your teeth chatter -- that unusual feeling of something happening to your body that is completely out of your control? I mean, you can clench your jaw, and that will stop it, but if you are good and cold, you can't keep your jaw from tremoring pretty vividly. (Digby!)

Well, I am not cold, at all, and much of last night I was so warm as to be uncomfortable with it (if I hadn't been so stoned) but my jaw is vibrating pretty constantly. Completely constantly, I should say. Unnoticeable, unless I set the points of my teeth together (the only parts of them that will touch, swollen jaw hinge and all) and they rattle. Not loudly or violently, but definitely, and unstoppably!

I couldn't sleep last night, after the pills wore off, and at about four I got up and showered and dressed and went to the emergency room. I was the only person in there, except for a man sleeping on a couch, and it still took three hours to see a doctor and have him write me a prescription for antibiotics. Sheesh.

But I took it and went over to Walgreen's and filled it and promptly took some and went home. And then slept all morning until eleven, and now here I am. I've had a cup of tea, I've folded and put away some clothes, and I've watched Castle. I've also spaced out and stared off into nothing for about an hour. It is strange how much being unable to hear from one half of your hearing mechanism removes you from the action! Reminds me of Susanna when she had ear infection after infection, and pretty much lived in her own little world for about a year. She was about four, too, so the things that interested her would have been sort of hard to understand anyway -- and since she wasn't interacting, it sort of set her off from the rest of us.

Which is sort of where I am much of the time, anyway, know what I mean? But this just sort of underlines it.

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