Friday, September 19, 2014


Today is my birthday.  I am 49 years old today.  

Yesterday my cousin was telling me that when I turn fifty, all play time is over, I can no longer make excuses for myself as being too young to know something, or making a mistake because I didn't understand something -- "when you're fifty," she said.  "All bets are off."

Well.  However much truth you ascribe to something as didactic as that, it's not for another year, anyway.  I am 49 today.  And will be able to remember this, now, I hope, since this past year of being 48 was one of the hardest-to-remember years I have ever experienced.  I could never tell whether I was 47, 48, or 49, and had to stop and count laboriously backward from the date to the year of my birth.  And sometimes was incapable of doing that.  I just don't get numbers.  They don't speak to me, they don't live in my head.  Words, do; letters, also, do.  Numbers -- you kiddin' me?

Monday, September 8, 2014

Really Very Healthy!

I had my one-year check-up at the eye doctor's this morning before work -- turns out that the e-mail I got telling me that my next appointment would be covered by insurance was incorrect -- I still do not have vision insurance, and had to pay $100 upfront.  Going to be very tight for a week!  But that's okay -- I have bread and milk and tea and a tankful of gas.

In any case, my doctor, an NZed named Rory Cook kept murmuring, "So healthy!  Really healthy..."  which pleased me very much!  It is good for me to be told, occasionally (regularly would be better!) by someone who cannot be argued with, that my worries are for naught.  Like Bob, telling me that my car is running fine, when I am stressing over every little sound.

So, I am seeing out of very healthy eyes today!  And now that the dilation has gone away, I really am!

Saturday, September 6, 2014

No Floor to Stand On

So, last night I had a sudden swell of determination, and instead of sitting down with a plate of food and a book, I went into my bedroom, and began moving things around.  I didn't even wait until everything was put away and tidy, although later I wished I had.  You shall see.

I have been thinking about how to move the furniture in my bedroom around, to give me better usage of space, and keep me from having to walk around the foot of the bed to turn on my bedside lamp, and stand between the foot and the dresser to put clothes away, and all that sort of thing.

So I figured that if I opened the top drawer of the dresser, and leaned down to get my fingers into the gap at the bottom of the dresser, I could pull it along the carpet without taking all the drawers out (such a drag!) and then I could little by little get it away from the corner, where I intended to to put my bed.  So I did that, huffing and puffing like an old fashioned steam engine, and covering only five or six inches with each heave.  I got it over to the side of the room, and swung around so that it was directly in front of the tallboy dresser, and keeping me from getting to my closet.  

Then I went over to the bed, and stripped all the bedclothes, and the clothes-clothes, and the afghan off into one enormous pile which I heaved over into the doorway, just to be out of the way of the moving, but ready to be replaced (in part, at least) on the bed.  Then I stood the mattress and box springs up against the wall, and began trying to move the frame. 

To make a long and somewhat embarrassing story at least a bit shorter, I will just say that the headboard came suddenly all to pieces and one of the side-board parts did, too (in fact, it was already split, and just holding itself together in some bizarre and possibly magical way, waiting for me to give it a good hard tug, so it could all fly to bits at once.) 

So then I had to realize that there was nothing I could do about this, that the bed frame wasn't worth re-assembling and gluing, again, and that I had better just disassemble the whole thing, and throw it away, and get a new/secondhand one.

So I ended up doing that, which was more difficult than moving the bed in one piece was going to be -- in my imagination, anyway -- and involved carrying the separate pieces of the bed frame out into the hallway over the large hump of bedclothes and afghan and clothes-clothes which I had just hurled into the doorway -- say about thigh deep -- and put the mattress and box springs (which are the part of the bed that I was PLANNING on getting rid of, they are so old and worn out and crunchy) into the corner, and remaking it, down on the floor.  Now I was drenched in sweat, and very tired, so I clambered over the (slightly less) large pile of clothes and afghans and bedspreads in the doorway and out into the living room and collapsed into my chair for about forty-five minutes, to catch my breath and wait for my heart to start beating normally again.

And slept there, last night -- quite comfortably, in so far as anything that involves that mattress is ever comfortable -- and when I got up this morning, and was getting ready to come to work, I couldn't get into my closet.  Because there was a dresser in the way, and a pile of clothes which were on the floor preparatory to being washed, which had been pushed back into the doorway of the closet, so that even  if I had been able to clamber over the dresser, I would still have been stymied by the no-floor-to-stand-on issue.

Friday, August 29, 2014

Geisler's House

So I went to Doug and Kathy's house for dinner the other night.  It's a large modern home, looking from the outside like any other housing development home built in the 2000s.  I was sort of appalled as I drove up to the three-car garage.  It's the kind of home that wouldn't even register on my brain as I passed it, so completely do I have no desire whatsoever to live in one.


The really excellent thing about this house, which has a lot of good, comfortable things about it, actually -- the really excellent thing, as I said, is the VIEW.

From the upper deck in the backyard, right up under a very tall conifer of some variety, you can see across hilltop after hilltop, and hints of valleys below. As the sun began to set, the sunset filled the entire sky, since they are high enough on Mount Scott (I know, it's called Happy VALLEY, but that's just false advertising) to have nothing in the way to the west and south.  And when it grew dark, the moon was large, vivid and right...over...there.  Moonlight drenched the backyard, already beautiful with water and bridges and flowering shrubs.  It was LOVELY.

Was it enough to make me want to live in a Wealthy House TM?    Nope.  But certainly enough to make me want to go back and visit them again.

Thursday, August 28, 2014

A Universal Shape

So I'm in my office reading an article about totem poles from Sitka, Alaska, that were displayed at the Lewis and Clark Exposition here in Portland in the early 1900s.  I'm always interested in the Exposition, because my apartment building was built to house the workers.

Anyway, I was talking to Nameless Agent about this, and they were looking at pictures of the poles.  "You gotta wonder what it is about that shape," Nameless mused.  "Is it like pyramids?"

"What do you mean, pyramids?" I asked, confused.

"Well, you know pyramids are some universal shape.  They've discovered that.  And all the totem poles you see are the same shape, so I wonder if they are some universal shape, too?"

"Well --" I wasn't sure where to go with this.  "Totem poles are all the same shape because they are all carved out of a tree trunk.  So maybe that makes them a universal shape.  I guess I don't know what that means, really."

 "Nobody does," said Nameless solemnly.

Thursday, August 21, 2014

It's Moderatin'

I slept under all the covers last night!  With my pajamas ON!    'Course, I woke up at two, and didn't fall completely back to sleep -- just dozed off and on until  the alarm went off -- but still, the weather is improving!  Or, to quote Huckleberry Finn, it's moderatin'.

I dreamed this morning that I was here in the office, and Mickey was coming in to teach class.  She looked at the signs I had posted about the class, and said, "Bethie, these are wrong, these are not my class!"

I said, "But those are the ones you sent me!"

Mickey said, "No, they aren't --- oh, DAD!!"

And I realized: A) Uncle Ken had made the mistake, sending Mickey's e-mail out for her, and B) Uncle Ken is sending Mickey's e-mail out for her??!!  Uncle Ken now WORKS FOR MICKEY??!!

You see how my subconscious mind works?

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Peaches and Nebbiolo

Another empty day.  I shouldn't mind, and in fact, I don't -- I can easily enjoy myself in front of a computer screen for eight hours at a time -- but I feel as though I should.  I feel as though I am not "living life to the fullest" if I just meander along and do nothing for eight hours.  So I am feeling guilty for not felling guilty for not accomplishing anything.  I should be writing my novel!  Or -- letters to people!  Or running my own computer business or SOMETHING.  Instead of merely allowing time to pass me by.

In any case.

I went to see Heather last night -- my friend from Prairie with the houseful of foster and adopted children (and several of her own body as well.)  I went specifically to listen to her talk, because her 22 year old son had recently killed himself.

Joe is 22.

And I am going to see Julieann, my second cousin once removed this evening!  Am just killing time (the death of more time!) before heading over there.  Have peaches for grilling (she is a non-gluten eater) and some Nebbiolo.

And!  I got a beautiful blue single hide-a-bed sofa!  This past Saturday as ever was.  I found it, negotiated with the people to deliver it to my living room, moved the furniture around in there to accommodate it, and I love it!  It is beautiful and perfect and will make my next batch of company so much easier!