This past week I got my checks deposited and wrote my rent check, paid Joe's ticket with his money, and paid for his storage locker. And that's it. That's all the money it was, for half a month. My mother very sweetly gave me a check for $24 which will go toward one of my other bills, in the towering pile on the dining room table. But what am I doing? Is it right for me to be living this life? Can I make it? Joe's phone service will not get paid for, this month, because his money had to go toward paying off his ticket. And of course, it's in my name. I paid my car insurance bill on my credit card, but I haven't even made a credit card payment for a month -- no money. Phone bill, electricity -- I guess I can do without a phone for awhile -- I'm at work most of the day, anyway. My next check will go, mostly, toward paying off Aunt Kathy -- I'll have $250 left over. And that will pay at least one of the bills.
No, no -- panic receding. I'm going to be fine. If I can just keep Joe from doing anything stupid for two more months -- then I can pack his little behind into the army.
And my mother, so very kindly, lent me her digital camera, so I will be selling stuff online, as soon as I can get it together to do that. Starting, in fact, tonight. I will keep careful track of what I do online, and see how well that works for me. I'll start with a few of my valuable books -- because why should I keep them just to have? They are beautiful, but they don't do me nearly as much good as the money they are worth will do me.
It's going to be okay! I'm going to be okay. I can do this, and still take care of my bills, and everything will work out.